Based on a true story of the daily battles of a teen and her christian mother because the teen wanted to be relevant in a teen’s world but the mother wanted her to walk the christian path. Their worlds collided creating endless mistrust, misjudgment and bias behaviors. The teen wished to be 18 to have freedom and her wish came true before time, taking her 1000 miles away from home. She no longer wanted her wish and wanted to be back home; but it was too late. Their distance created a bond allowing them to smile, talk and laugh for a while, until that bond was again broken, but permanently when the mother chose sides with another sibling after a fallout. The mother rid the other “good riddance” as the other left and returned to her world. The mother unexpectedly passed away.
I remembered lying in bed curled up in a fetal position and holding my left side while crying in pain for dear mercy. As the pain intensified I cried out more while clutching my side, but with no ease from the pain. It truly felt like I was going to die. I thought there was no way the human body could withstand this much pain. I believed I was going to die because I did not know what was happening to me. Was this it? Is this how death feels like? I felt like something was about to explode inside of me. After hearing my cries, my mother leisurely walked into my room, stood over my bed and watching down at me with an unconcerned and calmed emotion she asked, “What’s wrong with you?” I told her I was getting sharp burning and stabbing pain on my left side that intensified. And as I tried explaining to her what was happening to me, my words kept breaking apart due to the pain that kept overwhelming me. Every 3 words I uttered, I had to take a breath from the pain I was enduring. Once I was able to complete my sentence to my mother, she then turned around, walked out of my room, sat on her sewing machine and started to sew while I laid in pain. Her sewing machine was in the living room right opposite my bedroom doorway so she could easily look across the hallway and see me laying in bed. Once she sat on her sewing machine and started to sew, she then started to sing. I recognized the song. It was one of the songs she always sang when she would just be about the house doing chores. The song usually takes her in her own world because sometimes when you tried to get her attention, she would be so caught up in what she was doing in conjunction with her singing, you would almost have to repeat yourself. I could not believe what just happened. I could not believe what was happening while I laid on my bed in dire pain crying for mercy from God, feeling like I was about to die. My mother ignored me as if I did not matter. If there was ever a time I did not feel loved, it was that day.
A mother’s love is needed by everyone. But what exactly is a mother’s love? Everyone wants it and they say everyone requires it for normalcy. But how does it truly feel? How do you define a mother’s love? Many have different beliefs in what a mother’s love is or should be, especially when coming from a child’s perspective. To an adult, it simply means supplying love, caring and proper guidance to that child along with ethics and morals so they can handle life situations with the best education that applies. What does it mean to a child? Once that love is bestowed upon a child, how long should it last? What makes a child feel loved and comfortable throughout their young life? I believe we were all put on this universe for a purpose; to belong. To belong to someone or something and then we may find our purpose in life. Not belonging to anyone or anything strips us of defining who we are, and what we are about. When we don’t belong, we somehow feel lost and possibly confused. We may then begin to feel useless and so many questions may easily arise in our heads and if not properly address, can possibly trigger off many unbalance thoughts and actions affecting many lives…
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About the Author
Once you stay focused regardless, you are inevitable to succeed one way or another. Author/Writer/Self-Publisher, Learning coach.
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